yesterday was really really bad... seriously... 1st two periods of the day was maths... super stupid.. starting off the day is A maths is always bad... seriously... when ppl wanna ask qns... the teacher just contines the lesson... they dun even care... i've learnt not to ask anymore qns... so after the stupid A maths.. went for E maths... didnt do the hw....cuz the day b4 had rehearsal.. so didnt have time and i was already very tired... den the teacher told us to hand in or we have to stay back... so obviously i asked if she could extend the deadline.. i mean.. wats the diff? its only afew days... den she didnt agree to it.. den since i was like already super tired.. i didnt feel like doin it.. den she came to talk to me.. den i said i was tired... so after that had kind of a small arguement... my day was already bad enough... so after the reasoning out.. and the teacher talk.. blah..blah..blah... the class ended... super stupid... den went for other classes... english and ss was ok.. it was fun... at least it brightened up my day alittle... anyway... after school had rehearsal... was already damn tired.. but still went... after the long hrs of rehearsal, went home... ate dinner... look at my books... tried to study... talked on the phone for awhile... and sleep...

today... hmm.. today went to school normal time... yeah forgot to bring headgear... how stupid of me... den had to ask my mum to help me get it... bleh... den after that had the actual thing.. was quite hot.. the sun was shining upon everyone... but it was ok.. not as hot as the evening... so the thing only lasted about 15mins... so after that headed to the auditorium... while some of the A-band ppl went to the concert hall... yeah... it was basically quite normal day for me.. not to good, not too bad... thats because i didnt have to see my teachers for long...

sigh i noe i have been really different these few days... but its really pressure... i'm like really stressed out... with all teh teacher's demands... peer pressure... tuition's demands... parent's demands... i mean.. i have already so many demands to make... i don't think i can take it.. i just can't... i cant take all the pressure anymore... i have so much stuff to do in 24 hrs... and i'm already siffering from fatigue... its only half way through the week... and i'm mentally, spirtually, physically tired... i feel like breaking down.. i dun feel like goin to school anymore... i cant.. i'm so tired... y cant i have a day off.. y cant the teachers just understand me... y cant they be more understandin... dont they have a heart? the least i hope is that you'll understand what i'm goin through... but it seems that even you dun get me... even you... y? y do i always have to tell myself to go on.. and yet get more dissapointed? i'm sick of trying to save the thing that i want most... i'm sick of askin qns when the teacher dun give a damn about it... i'm sick of them... why cant there be a green field wherever i go? why must it always be barren.. and i have to be the one.. why do i have to be the one to get tested and tested again and again... to be put on trials... when i have not even recovered from the last fall... when i'm still down.. and i'm being pushed down more..and its so hard to climb up... i cant do it.. i cant take it... i feel like giving my life all up... i just feel that i really need a good well break... and i cant do it... i cant... i cant take it anymore.. i cant hold on... i cant keep up... i just cant...



pushing on..